I've been having a whole bunch of feelings lately.
First of all: over the past 4 days, I realized one of my biggest life-long dreams. Well, I haven't been dreaming about it my whole life, but pretty close--since I started studying French 5 years ago or so.
It seems rather cliché to have "Seeing the Eiffel Tower" as an American white girl's dream, but for those of you who really know me, my love for the French language and for France itself kind of borders on obsession. People who have had a French class with me in the past can attest to this. I know I was annoying about it, guys, and I'm sorry. Actually, no I'm not. Désolée, pas désolée.
Anyway...here is one of my favorite pictures of la Tour Eiffel. I cannot decide if I like it better during the day or at night. Bonus: at night, on the hour, this thing SPARKLES.
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| Almost looks like a Google stock photo, doesn't it? |
In order to save money, I took a Megabus from London to Paris. Let me just tell you how much fun that was. No, seriously...there's no sarcasm there. I met two lovely British girls who were on their way to Paris to run the half marathon there, and a very friendly French boy named Antonin. We all talked for much of the bus ride, and we played cards and drank tea when we had to board the ferry to get to the Continent. They made what would have been a miserable bus ride into an enjoyable experience. First rule of Europe: talk to strangers. (At your own discretion).
The bus dropped me off at Porte Maillot, which was a 5km walk from my hostel. I didn't mind. I wanted to walk and see this city that has plagued my dreams for so long. It was raining, but this is Europe. It's rarely not raining. I'm struggling with my soggy map as I try to get my bearings. I walk down a street, turn a corner, and BAM--there are the Champs-Élysées! And at the end? L'Arc de Triomphe! I'm aghast. It's about 6:45am, so the Champs-Élysées are bare--a rare sight. So I take a stroll down it. I look at my map and compass and head south toward the hostel.
Paris is exactly how you would imagine. Cafés everywhere, crêperies galore, and cheap, excellent wine (if you buy it in a sketchy convenience store). I'm simply enjoying my walk as I take everything in as I head south. I round another corner and...
WHOA.
There it is. The Eiffel Tower. For the first time. At about 7:30am on March 1st, 2014. It's just standing there, chillin', doing what it does every day.
And my eyes just well up. A tear rolls down my cheek as I pick up my pace, almost jogging toward it. I must have looked like a tourist idiot, with my backpack bouncing on my back. I didn't care.
As I walk through the gardens that surround the tower, I can't help but have a strange feeling in my gut. I'm grappling with these feelings of elation and happiness, but at the same time I'm thinking, "Wow. Well here we go. I'm here, and this is what I've worked toward. Years of studying, hours of scholarship essay writing, months of saving...and here I am.
.....What now?"
Honestly, I don't know. I feel like I have to have a new dream to establish, a new "unattainable" destination to reach. I am at a loss.
You know, I miss home. I do. I miss my people. And my dog. I miss getting a 32oz sweet tea for a dollar and economy-sized bags of shredded cheese. I can't shake this fear of being completely changed when I come home. I'm definitely afraid of being "that pretentious girl who won't stop talking about her trip to Europe."
What will happen when I round the corner and see...a Pilot gas station? Well, nothing will happen, but I don't want to stop seeing epic things that are older than America is, like the Roman Baths, the Tower of London, or my flat.
But I'll tell you what. I would love to round the corner and see my mom.
Or my dad.
Or Dominic, my awesome little brother.
Or my closest friends.
Or Rocco.
Or Garrett. The hug I'm giving that guy when I get back. He better start bracing himself.
I am so incredibly happy that I got to see Paris. I got to see it with a friend from French class! Even better! Katie showed me all the great spots--one of my favorite being Sacré Cœur. You can see all of Paris from there, man! She showed me such an amazing time both in Paris and Bordeaux, where she lives. She even took me to a legitimate French college party. We each got two free t-shirts! It doesn't get any better than that. Turns out even organizations in France use free t-shirts to woo people into supporting their causes. Countries are not that different. ;)
Again, thank you all so much for reading. I'm sorry about being so lazy about writing. If you're reading this, I think you're super special.
À bientôt!
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